This'll scare the bejesus out of you. It did me!

Bumper sticker seen on my way home from work tonight:

PALIN / HUCKABEE 2012

I must go lie down now until the pain in my brain lets up.

The god of Lowe's

The fastest way to get to Target from our house involves cutting through the parking lot of  a Lowe's store.  Shortly after the store opened my Dear Husband came home from one of his almost daily trips to either Target or Lowe's and said that he thought the god of Lowe's was working overtime.  I asked him to explain, and he told me he felt there must surely be some special deity looking out for the Lowe's customers because they sure as hell don't look out for themselves!  They walk right in front of cars. They operate shopping carts recklessly.  They do not watch where they're going.

In the intervening years, we have continued to be amazed at how well the god of Lowe's takes care of the Lowe's patrons.  

This morning was particularly bad.  I actually saw a car almost hit an old couple, and it would have been TOTALLY the old peoples' fault.  Fortunately, the god of Lowe's swooped in and stopped the car just in the nick of time.

The god of Lowe's is pretty awesome, but that kind of over-protectiveness seems to encourage people to behave irresponsibly.  

A Totally Delightful Surprise

A year or so ago our very favorite restaurant in the world closed.  Dear Husband and I ate lunch there at least two Sundays a month, and we often had dinner there as well.  Food was limited to old fashioned Florida seafood -- fried by somebody who knew their way around a stove!  Everything was take-out but they had picnic tables all around the building, which sits on a little promontory between the intracoastal waterway and a marina.  Pelicans, seagulls and every other manner of coastal bird sit on posts around the dock.  Dolphins and the occasional manatee were routine visitors. I'm not a huge fan of fried fish, but I loved the atmosphere so much, I ate it anyway.  Sitting in outside in the sunshine, with a cold beer and visiting with native Florida critters was enough for me.

Ever since the place closed, we've been checking back periodically to see if someone else might open a restaurant there.  In recent weeks, someone was remodeling the building and it appeared that a new restaurant was in the works.  Today, it was open.  The views are the same.  The beer is still cold. The counter area and kitchen had gotten kind of run down; now it's all clean and new.  They need some new picnic tables outside, but far be if from me to quibble about a little thing like that.

The best part was the food!  For one thing, they offered both grilled and blackened fish in addition to the awesome fried stuff. DH doesn' t like blackened fish, so we split a seafood platter and got the oysters and scallops fried, with grilled fish and shrimp.  It was hands-down the best grilled shrimp I've ever tasted and the fish rivaled my benchmark grilled fish from a dive on Key Largo.  (The only points off were that it was mahi mahi, not grouper.) The Cole slaw was good and so were the hush puppies. I wasn't much for the tartar sauce (it was made with miracle whip, which I think is a disgusting concoction that should not be considered actual food).  However, the fish was so good it didn't need the tartar sauce, so I didn't care.  

As if all that were not enough, the price was right. 

Pickin' and Grinnin'

Over the years, I earned a slew of free CD's from the BMG music club but had never redeemed any of them because I hate their website and I never could figure out exactly how to do it.  Recently I received notice that the free CD's were to be eliminated and I only had a few months in which to redeem the ones I had earned or I would lose them.  I figured out how to navigate the website PDQ and ordered about 12 CD's (got free shipping to boot!). The stupid people at BMG shipped my order in like five batches. (When they're giving away free CD's and free shipping, you'd think they'd want to ship them all at once, but that could just be me.)  

The good part about that was I had the chance to savor and enjoy each CD for a while as it came in.  Some I liked better than others, but they were all pretty good.  A week or so ago, I received a message that one of the CD's I had ordered was not available, so I had to make another selection.  I was kind of distracted and not in the mood to shop for music, so I sort of picked a random CD without thinking much about it.  It came in the mail the other day, but I didn't have a chance to listen to it today.

I went for a two hour walk and listened to it twice. It is the best "walking music" I have besides Jimmy Buffet.  It is also far and away the "happiest" album I have ever owned.  I've been very depressed lately. This album hit me like a half-bottle of Zoloft (I guess: I've never taken any actual anti-depressant medicine).  I caught myself walking along smiling today.  It is more than feel-good music: it rises all the way to the level of soul-healing music.

The album: Three Pickers  The artists: Doc Watson, Earl Scruggs and Ricky Skaggs (with Allison Kraus on some vocals). 

It just don't get any better than that!

Reading Scripture

Every once in a while I take a notion to read the lectionary readings for the day. A while back I did that for a few days just for the heck of it. The result wasn't so much anything learned from the specific readings as it was a reflection on the process and purpose of reading Scripture in the first place.  This thread at Pooch's reminded me of what I wrote about my experience of Scripture.

My most common reaction reading Scripture is often a kind of baffled wonderment. Some of the references are difficult to understand without looking up information on the context. Some of it is just plain weird, strange and even totally incomprehensible. But a lot of it strikes me as fresh, inspiring, uplifting and comforting no matter how many times I have read it or heard it read from the pulpit (which is how Scripture should be experienced in my opinion). [I realize how ridiculous that sounds coming from someone who does not go to church. I do not claim to be consistent, God knows!]

We know there are multiple authors for most of the books in the Bible. Especially in the Old Testament there are actually competing and/or contradictory versions of the same story woven through entire books. There's almost a point-counterpoint (in music is that called contrapuntal?) effect. It's like an echo.

The Prophet stands up and says, "God will smite you!"
God's Messenger says, "God loves and will have mercy on you."

The Teacher says, "Listen to the Word of the Lord, and obey."
God's Messenger says, "Listen to your heart and follow the path of love."

The Church says, "Outside the Church there is no salvation."
The Lord says, "Come ..." for rest and for life abundant. I love the image of: "....a good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over..."

A person could get sort of intellectual and/or spiritual whiplash reading this stuff. I used to try to study Scripture by studying every word and considering the nuance, the context, the audience. I got caught up in the details of hermeneutics and historical-critical biblical exegesis. All of that can be very cool, especially to someone with a literary bent. Some of that is even sort of important. But, I found that I too easily lost the forest for the trees when I studied the text too closely. Scripture is a little like spilled mercury. It's a bitch to try to gather into one glob, and it's toxic if you're not careful. It is also incredibly beautiful and useful, if you handle it cautiously.

After a lot of trial and error, I reached the point where I was able to read Scripture the way I listened to it read from the pulpit: I sort of let it flow over and around me and I don't try to think about it too much or force it to go anywhere in particular. I listen to the words and phrases that jump out and mean something to me today, on this particular reading. My assumption is that I have read it before, and I will read it again someday so I don't need to wring every bit of meaning out of it. I have a general idea of the hermeneutics and all that stuff. What I want now is to know what the text has to say to me today.

The tension between the "church" and the "spiritseekers" is clear in Scripture. I take great comfort in the message that God cares for all God's children, both those who stick to the straight and narrow as well as the wayward and recalcitrant ones, like me.

I Have A Job

As I mentioned recently over at Pooch's Place, my parents were products of the Depression and WWII. Their experiences as children and young adults colored the way they managed their home.

It also affected their attitude about work. My mother was a homemaker. My dad worked in a factory.  They both believed that if a company was willing to pay you a salary and provide you any benefits whatsoever, you should respond with gratitude, and  a whole lot of hard work.  My dad's mantra was that if the Company paid you for 40 hours a week, you should work at least 45 hours, because you probably screwed around at least a few hours during the week.  

In today's world, that may not be an option for most hourly workers whose employers won't allow them work overtime due to budgetary constraints. When I was an hourly worker, I routinely worked ten hours of overtime a week, and I often worked twice that.  I'm salaried now, and I don't have to worry about requesting authorization for overtime.  I still work a minimum of ten hours a day; most weeks I work considerably more than fifty hours.

That may make me something of a nut, but I have a job.  In the worst economy I ever remember, I've got steady, well-paying job.  I can assure you, I will be working a lot of extra hours and going to even more extraordinary lengths than usual in the coming months because my father impressed upon me the fact that nobody owes me a living.  I'm lucky enough to have an employer who is willing to pay me for my services.  They don't owe it to me. I have to earn it -- every day.

One of my biggest problems with Gens X, Y, and Z (or whatever the Generation after Y is) is that they approach getting paid as an entitlement, not a gift.

I view everything about my life as a Gift.  For me, getting paid for my services (both salary and benefits) falls into the category of Privilege/Gift as opposed to an entitlement.

In the worst economic times since the Great Depression that so permanently scarred my parents' psyches, I have a job that pays a living wage, and then some. 

Am I grateful?  You bet your ass I am! And I will do whatever it takes to maintain the status quo.  I have a family to support, including a kid in college.

I have a job.  Thank you, God. Please, help me to keep it.

ARRA -- Hmmm....

The other day I receive an email from Sojourners which expressed satisfaction with the bailout proposed by the Obama administration. I did not have time to review it in detail, but I thought it was interesting that Sojourners sort of liked the Obama version of the bailout. When Sojourners likes legislation, I'm pretty sure I will too.

Today, I read a summary of the total package for the first time.  I understand why Sojourners was happy with it.  It's got all the right stuff in it to prevent people from falling through the cracks.  It includes a lot of good stuff, I think.

It also provides for bailing out businesses and financial institutions that I think should be allowed to fail. 

Nevertheless, it is clear that our President's heart is in the right place.  The man's got his priorities all lined up correctly.

My only concern is: where is all this money supposed to come from??

Cogitations on Government Bailouts

I do not pretend to understand the intricacies of economics, nor do I care to make the effort to learn.  I do not understand all the factors that brought us to our present predicament, nor do I even pretend to have a clue about the best way to get us out of it.  I have read a lot of articles lately arguing every facet of the issue. For the most part, they only make me more confused.  

Generally, I can be very objective about things, but when I truly don't understand the facts, my emotions run rampant.  I typically try not to be too dogmatic about things, but when my understanding fails and my emotions run amok, then my psyche falls back on ideology in a desperate attempt to cling to something.  

In the case of our present crisis, that only creates more confusion for me because, while I'm a bleeding heart liberal who usually takes the side of the poor and the underdog, I also believe in free markets and personal responsibility. While I believe that whatever the government ultimately does about the crisis should include provisions for the sick, the aged, the young and the otherwise truly helpless, I don't like this whole bailout business on general principals.

The thread over at Pooch's Place about how people survived the Great Depression and a number of conversations we have had at work have caused me to think a lot about this whole bailout thing.  It sort of flies in the face of my political ideals, but emotionally I'm opposed to the whole idea of government bailouts. The financial institutions got into trouble because they lent money for people to buy houses they couldn't afford.  The bailout provides relief to the banks who made the bad loans and, potentially, to the borrowers.  WTF?  How is that fair? What about those of us who bought small houses we could afford and who never made a late payment? Why should we pay taxes to rescue banks who made stupid loans and forgive loans for people to live in big houses they couldn't afford in the first place.  

I live in a two-bedroom concrete-block-and-stucco house that is considerably less than 2000 square feet. It belongs to us free and clear.  We were never late with a payment and we paid off the entire loan years ahead of schedule.  Call it sour grapes, but I'm not really thrilled about the prospect of my taxes going towards forgiveness of loans for people who are living in big houses they couldn't otherwise afford. I could use that money to make some upgrades to my house!

Why should the government bail out the auto industry?  If General Motors made a car as good as a Honda Accord, people might buy it.  My last car was a Saturn. I'd happily driven Jap Crap for decades, but let my DH talk me into the Saturn because it was cheap.  Didja ever hear the one about "you get what you pay for"?  The Saturn was cheap because it was crap.  I am happily driving an Accord again.  Why should we bail out the American car manufacturers because they mismanaged their companies and make shitty cars?  What about the whole idea of free markets and capitalism?  We don't bail out the mom and pop hardware store that got put out of business when WalMart came to town.  Why should we bail out Ford because it can't compete with Toyota in the free market?

I think the market should be allowed to correct itself. If the government is going to bail anybody out, it should provide a lifeline to people who get caught up in the fallout. I'd rather see the government provide health insurance, education subsidies and child care subsidies to unemployed and underemployed people until they can get back on their feet when their employers implode.  I admit that's a position that arises from my ideological belief in the free market and my emotional feeling that it's not fair for people like me to have to subsidize and bail out people who overreached their ability to pay, and ended up with nicer houses than I have!

This whole subject makes me feel that I am being small minded and petty, but I can't help but feel there is something fundamentally un-American with the whole idea of government bailouts for failed businesses.

Hearing

I have written about my hearing loss before.  I first noticed a problem with my hearing when I was a teenager. My doctor told me at the time that there was nothing that could be done to help my hearing loss. In recent years, I tried single hearing aids (one ear only).  That just did not work.  Perhaps the only truth they tell in trying to sell hearing aids is that two heaing aids are better than one -- one for each ear. 

Thirty years after I first noticed a problem with my hearing, I have found myself less and less able to cope with daily life. I get confused about what people say in meetings.  I can't understand most of what people say on telephone conference calls. I struggle to understand dialogue on television.  I avoid going to restaurants or other crowded places because I can't understand individual conversations in noisy environments.  

Getting through each day has become exhausting because I have to concentrate so hard to understand what people are saying to me. Too often, I can't really figure it out, and I guess.  Sometimes I guess wrong and give really inappropriate responses to questions or comments from my bosses and co-workers.  I can't begin to express how humiliating it is when I do that ... and the person I'm talking to looks at me like I'm some kind of moron. 

My problems in communications have been growing worse in recent years. Recently, it has gotten so bad, I had to do something.  I finally broke down and went to a hearing clinic to have my hearing checked.  The results did not really surprise me, but it freaked me out.  The price for the hearing aids they recommended was in the neighborhood of $5000.  I was prepared to pay that, but decided to check online one last time.  I found a pair of hearing aids very similar to what I had selected for a fraction of the price, and with a 30 day money-back guarantee.  I decided to give it a try. I would try the aids for 30-days to see if I could tolerate them.  I ordered the new behind-the-ear, open-fit hearing aids.

I picked up the aids at the post office on Tuesday.  I thought it would take me half the evening to read the instructions and get them set up.  My husband decided to go hang out with his buddies in order to get out of my way.  Less than five minutes after he left, I had them in my ears and working. It was as though I had been watching TV with the sound turned almost all the way off for most of my life! Most of my understanding was based on a combination of lip-reading and guess-work from body language. 

Immediately after putting the aids in my ear, I could hear!!

 

In the two days since, I have heard sounds I have not heard in years: birds singing; doors slamming (Lord, do we have a lot of doors slamming at work!); my assistant's radio playing; conversations taking place in the hall. It has been an amazing experience. The world has opened up to me in whole new ways! My life is an adventure, which now includes an audio component it has not had for a long time.

If these hearing aids only last a few months and I have to end up buying the expensive ones, that will be okay. The point is that I have been given back something I thought I had lost forever.  

Addendum: 

After my third day with the aids, I continue to be astonished and amazed at how quickly I have adapted to them and how dramatically they have changed my life. I'm much more relaxed because I don't have to concentrate so hard on understanding conversations, and I'm more confident that I am not going to make a fool of myself with inappropriate responses to questions I didn't understand.

As I said, above: I have been given back something I thought I had lost forever.   I failed to add that I am so incredibly grateful for this miracle I have no words to describe it.

The Winter of our Hardship

I watched President Obama's press conference the other night. I think it's the first presidential press conference I have watched in its entirety since the Carter Administration.  I was impressed.  He was articulate and familiar with the issues. It was a treat to watch an intelligent, articulate and truthful president, after the last eight years of bumbling around and the eight years before that of dissembling and the eight years before that of ignoring the questions altogether. I thought the president did a good job under terrible circumstances.

He underscored the fact that he inherited this mess. He did not create it.   To his credit, he also emphasized it is his job to fix it, regardless of how on earth we got here.  I like that attitude: never mind how we got here.  We move forward from where we are.

I like the fact that he has a plan, which is flexible and (hopefully) responsive to the actual situation. 

Despite being a sort of wacko social bleeding-heart liberal, I'm kind of a fiscal conservative who believes that government should not bail out private companies that get themselves into a crack because of their own greed and internal corruption.  A part of me would like to reject the stimulus plan for that reason alone.  Daughter Dear was here the whole time.  She agrees with the president that the time is now for the government to act boldly. I can't bring myself to disagree, mainly because I hope that something will turn things around. I have my doubts about the effectiveness of the bailout plan.  I think the Mystery of the Market will have its way, regardless of what the federal government does.

I thought President Carter was right when he said there was a "crisis of confidence in America" in 1979.  He paid dearly for that speech. I thought President Obama was right when he referred to this as the "Winter of our Hardship."  I hope the repercussions for him are not so dire. 

Chilly Day Outing

Yesterday it was too chilly to go to the beach, so we went to a nearby park.  

It was a fun change of pace to walk in the quiet of the woods, with leaves crunching under our feet. 

Spruce Creek.  The water looks like melted chocolate, hiding heaven only knows what kinds of critters, including but not limited to alligators, water moccasins and other assorted creepy-crawlies and swimmers I would prefer not to think about.

Another shot of the creek.  This is definitely a cool weather outing. We decided we would not want to go there in the summertime, what with the skeeters, flies, and other flying-and-biting insects.  

Sad ... but Grateful

I was saddened to read today that Justice Ginsberg has cancer.  I have admired her from the time she was first appointed to the Supreme Court, which was when she first came to my attention.  I have continued to admire the grace and good humor with which she has conducted herself among the other Justices.  During the latter part of the Bush administration -- especially after Chief Justice Roberts joined the Court and Justice O'Connor stepped down -- she and Justice Kennedy have done their best to balance the Court as much as possible.  

One of my biggest concerns during the Bush's second term was that something bad would happen to one of them.  I am grateful that both of them managed to hold out until President Obama was inaugurated.  At least if something were to happen to one of the Justices, he will no doubt try to nominate a suitable replacement. 

Coming Up For Air

I have been distracted lately: Work;  Life/family; Writing; Trying to stay warm.

I know. I know.  I shouldn't complain about the cold in Florida, because the folks up north are in the DEEP FREEZE.  They are dealing with snow and ice and sub-zero temps.  My mother tells me the snow in her front yard looks like a wedding cake: a layer of snow, a layer of ice, more snow, more ice.  

How dare I complain about being cold?  

Well, for one thing, I don't own a coat. I have a couple of sweatshirts and a light jacket.  I don't have gloves or a hat. The furnace in our house is just not up to the job of keeping the place warm in a cold snap like the one we're having. In the house, I can wrap up in multiple layers of clothing. 

At work, it's a different story. I've worn all my turtle neck shirts already this week. Now what?  Tonight it's supposed to be the coldest it's been.  I have nothing warm left to wear to work tomorrow!

I hate winter.   It is dark when I leave for work. Dark when I come home. And it is cold.  Maybe not as cold as it was in the Midwest, but uncomfortably cold for the life I live.  I still hate it.

So, what have I been doing about it?  Snuggling up in a blanket and writing up a storm. 

Blogging has sort of take a back seat lately.  Maybe I'll get back with it when I warm up a little. 

Keeping Promises!

This week, President Obama reversed the Bush policy on torture and lifted the ban on federal money to organizations that provide abortion counselling.  That makes two giant steps in the right direction.  He is walking the walk. That is good.

Next I hope he will request Congress to repeal the Patriot Act and then the Department of Homeland Security. 

Maybe then we can all sleep a little more soundly! 

Do we live in a great country, or what???

In what other country in the history of the world would the past leaders (and their "backups") gather to celebrate the transfer of power?  Where else would a president, whose every utterance and act in eight [long, miserable, rotten] years in office has been totally opposed to everything the new president stands for, invite  the New Guy to have coffee and then turn around and attend his swearing in!??  In a way, I felt the transfer of power might have been George Bush's finest moment [which, of course, isn't saying a whole lot].  He and Mrs. Bush evidently handled it with grace and kindness. They are to be commended for that. Even if the crowd today was not prepared to thank President Bush for his "service" to our country, we should at least thank him for stepping aside gracefully. 

We live in a country where the former leaders and the future leaders agree that the symbolism of unity is more important than their individual differences.

I admit to being a sucker for ritual (must be something about that Roman Catholic upbringing), but the ritual of our Inaugural Ceremony makes me want to stand up and cheer.  I don't care about the parade and I have zero interest in the fancy balls tonight.  Tomorrow, I hope the folks in Washington get up, take an aspirin for their hangovers and, then, get the hell to work.

Today, however, is a day for a huge national celebration.  It is not a day of gloating about Obama's victory over the right-wing wackos who have tried to ruin our Country.  It is also not a day of vindication for black folks who feel their time has finally come (although, I understand why they would feel that way).  For me, Inauguration Day  

in America is about celebrating America, regardless of who the guy (or woman) is whom we are inaugurating into office. The millions of people who gathered on America's Front Yard (aka "The Mall") stood in for the rest of us as witnesses to the symbolism and the ritual of the peaceful transition of power in a free country where the rule of law applies.  It is about leadership elected by the majority of the led.  It is about checks and balances and the balance of power.  (Thank you Jimmy Madison!) Inauguration Day is America at its very, very, very best. 

I have watched the inaugurations of Kennedy, Johnson (twice), Nixon (twice), Ford, Carter, Reagan (twice), Bush I, Clinton (twice), and Bush II (twice), and now Obama.  Whether I liked the new president or not I have never failed to be moved by the fact that our country can transfer power in such a peaceful and orderly -- not to mention inspiring and beautiful -- manner. Yes, We Can! 

Now, let's see if we can help our new president turn our ship of state in a new direction and get down to the business of digging ourselves out of the ditch his predecessor put us in. 

Post Script:  Extra special Kudos to Senator Feinstein for her effecient and professional service as the M.C. 

"Anything is Possible in America"

Amen!

I have been resisting the urge to write about the Inauguration for several reasons.  One is that I am sorely tempted to toss off one last lurid anti-Bush screed.  While he no doubt deserves it, I am determined not to do that.  The sun set tonight on the Bush Administration. Tomorrow it will be a New Day in America.  I want to let the past go. 

The second reason I have been avoiding writing about the election is that I don't want to allow myself to get carried away with my joy at the fact that We The People  appear to be on the verge of taking back our country from those who would have destroyed the very things we hold dearest: Freedom of Speech; Freedom of Religion; Due Process; The Rule of Law.  Liberty and Justice -- for ALL. As joyful and hopeful as I feel tonight, I believe that we must be very careful not to expect too much of President Obama too soon. He has inherited an unholy mess. He will need time to get acclimated to his new job.  He will need our permission to try things that will fail, and then to try something new. We have to allow for a learning curve once he assumes office. 

It will very likely be years before this country can be turned around and put back on the right track.  President Obama won't be able to do it all by himself. He can lead us, but we have to follow, and participate, and cooperate. And, yes, By God, we'll have to SACRIFICE.  The next two to three years will be very hard. I imagine the economy will get worse before it gets better.  Americans are not patient people.  I am very afraid that if we let ourselves get carried away by our joy now, we will expect too much, too soon, and the nation that called Barack Obama to lead it could turn on him in a minute.  I don't want to contribute to that.  

Cautious optimism is called for now. We need to be moderate in our celebrations, and in our expectations.

My head knows that. 

But, oh, my Lord, my heart has totally different ideas!!! 

When I see a man stand up before his country and say "Yes, We Can!" despite all the obstacles, I want to stand up and shout. When I hear a moderate, intelligent, and clear voice call us forward to a new day, I want to follow, with jubilation. It's going to be a long, hard road, but we've made the first step.  

After the ordeal of the last eight years, that, all by itself, is enough to make me stand up and shout: "Free at last! Free at last! Thank God, Almighty, we are free at last." (Happy Birthday, Rev. King!)

I don't do much in the way of "intentional praying" any more (although I do tend to have a sort of subliminal conversation with The Holy going on more or less constantly).  In recent years, that subliminal conversation has often been along the lines of "Lord, have mercy on us."  In coming months and years, I hope to change my tune to "Strengthen him (and us), Oh, Lord".  

I don't know how it will come to pass or how long it will take, but for the first time in years, tonight I am allowing myself to feel a tiny spark of Hope for my country. I can feel Hope because I believe in the power of Grace.  And, Grace is the only explanation for the fact that tomorrow night this time Barack Obama will be our president, and the scoundrels who have been trying to destroy our way of life are scurrying away to crawl back under whatever rocks they climed out from.

God have mercy on our new President, and on all of us.

It Was a Total, Utter and Complete Fashion Meltdown

I know that I have had meltdowns in my life over things that, in retrospect, appeared to be blown out of proportion.  I know that those times occurred fairly frequently during the teen years (and daily -- or more often -- during pregnancy).  I still have a meltdown once or twice a year (usually once at work and once at home). [I hate melting down at work; it's so very undignified.]

But, I don't think I have ever in my life melted down with the drama and flair my Daughter Dear exhibits when she has a tantrum.  She can go ballistic over small things (takes after her father, she does). Slightly more significant problems can rival Chernobyl. Today we encountered a Really, Really Big Thing. I missed the worst of the drama, but it must have been really bad, given the way my Dear Husband and the Very Bad Dogs were behaving when I got home from work.

DD is going to a wedding tomorrow. A fancy wedding.  Wonderful BoyFriend's entire family will be there.  DD, of course, bought a new dress for the occasion. She paid way too much for it, even on sale. I know that because she bought it at the last minute (when you always pay too much).  Also, she won't tell me how much she paid for it...... on account of, if she did, she knows I would go ballistic, and one conniption fit at a time is sort of a good rule to follow.  

Anyway, she had a brand new dress, which was quite lovely. She was excited.  She was ready for her weekend of family festivities with The Most Wonderful Family on Earth (that is not an attempt at sarcasm: they really are a wonderful family).  She was all set.

However, late this afternoon disaster struck.  I am not sure exactly how it happened (I was afraid to ask) but somehow it came to pass that Wonderful BoyFriend accidentally broke the zipper on the fabulous new dress. Her outrageously expensive dress was equipped with one of those crappy plastic zippers that ought to be illegal.  Any company that would charge more than $20 for a dress with a side zipper made out of plastic should be ashamed.  Some of the older plastic zippers could be fixed. This was a cheesy, cheap, crappy new plastic zipper. It was hopeless. The dress was fit only for a dust cloth.

She called the store. They agreed take it back (even though it was on sale), but they did not have any other dresses like it at the sale price.  The hour was late. She probably would not have been able to get to the mall in Orlando before the store close, anyway.  We considered various options:  Pins; Sewing the side closed.  We decided that invasive procedures were not acceptable, because we want to return the dress and if we damaged it further our chances of getting the money back would be eliminated.

I decided the only option was wearing something she already has, and, to that end, I pulled a bunch of other dresses out of her closet. DD has enough clothes to start a freaking chain store! She has  some beautiful clothes.  I pulled out at least three outfits I thought would be lovely.  I pulled out a couple of dresses I didn't even know she had, and that I coveted immediately upon seeing them.  

Wearing something she already owned would not do, of course. (What was I thinking??) Ultimately she decided that, since it is very cold this weekend in Central Florida (relatively speaking) she will put a sweater over the dress and wear it with the side gaping open.  She will take an alternative dress to change into for the reception, if she feels uncomfortable.  That seemed like a reasonable compromise, I suppose. (Wearing something beautiful you have worn before would have been a better one, but I'm 54 and she's 19. That must make a difference.)

A little while ago, DD and WBF headed off for their weekend of celebration, exhausted and emotionally drained. 

DH had flown the coop earlier in the evening.  The dogs and I are here, traumatized and drained.  

I'm so grateful to be old and unfashionable! 

In My Next Life I Want to be a Restaurant Critic

I am going to start practicing now:

The other evening I had the opportunity to have dinner at The Lady and Sons in Savannah, Georgia.  I was looking forward to it because I love watching Paula Deen on the Food Channel.  Well, I don't really love watching her, because she's so loud and annoying, but I like the fact that her recipes often modernize the traditional Southern food I grew up on. I was very excited about the opportunity to eat at her restaurant. I expected to enjoy food with an interesting twist on traditional Southern food. 

Because we were a very large group, we were not given the option to order some of the really cool food from the menu.  We were only given the option of helping ourselves from the buffet. I was not thrilled by that, but I was with a group, and I did not plan the event, so I did not complain.

They seated us at a large table in the very back of the restaurant, up against the windows. Getting to the buffet was very inconvenient for the people at the back of the table. The table and chairs were  very rustic, and quite uncomfortable. There were no table cloths. The plates sat on paper doilies. The napkins were paper.  The plates were pottery.  Most of our party ordered beer.  They didn't bring glasses (even though I asked for one).  Ordinarily, none of that would have been a problem for me.  Hell, my idea of fine dining is bars that serve my beer in glass mugs as opposed to plastic.  My problem was that the bars where I usually eat cost less than $10 a plate. Our meal was $25 a head. For $25, I want a glass for my beer and a cloth napkin!!

Next they brought bread. We each got a biscuit and a hoecake.  The biscuit was okay, but very small. The hoecake was just nasty; it was greasy and otherwise tasteless.  I am a bread eater.  I was not happy about the bread. Things were not looking good.

We took turns at the buffet. The meat options consisted of fried chicken, pork chops and pot roast.  I don't like fried chicken; I passed on that. If I'm going to eat pork, I want it to be pulled pork with barbecue sauce, pork roast with some awesome glaze or crisp bacon. Otherwise, I pass on pork.  I make great pot roast, and I could tell by looking at the gravy that Paula's roast would not pass muster with me. I decided to skip the meat. No points off for that. I usually skip the meat at a buffet so as to save room for the best part of any meal -- the "go withs."

The starch options included mashed potatoes (presumably for Yankees who don't know any better) and perfectly cooked long grain white rice.  I made a bed of that on my plate to hold the veggies.

Veggies were: stewed cabbage, black-eyed peas, baby Lima's, collard greens, and green beans. At the end  of the line were the signature candied yams (without the marshmallows, thank you, Paula) and mac 'n' cheese.  

I skipped the collard greens (I vowed when I left home I would never eat collard greens or turnips again, and I have kept that promise for more than 35 years) and the green beans (also not a fave with me).  I loaded up on cabbage, peas and Lima's (the latter of which is my favorite veggie in all the world).  I tried a yam. 

I debated about the mac 'n' cheese.  Somewhere along the line in my life, somebody gave me the world's greatest mac 'n' cheese recipe.  My family loves it. People invite me to potlucks and request it.  The first time I saw Paula Deen on TV she made her mac 'n' cheese. I tried the recipe, and my entire family agreed that mine is better.  I took some of Paula's just to taste. It was good. Mine is definitely better. Daughter Dear and Wonderful Boyfriend agreed, but they said they liked the fact that she puts that layer of grated cheese on top. I can do that. I will do that next time I make mac 'n' cheese.  Then mine will be totally perfect!

Everything tasted wonderful!  The cabbage, peas and Lima's were perfect.  I loved the yam, which was not adulterated with (nasty) marshmallows.  The mac 'n' cheese was better than when I made Paula's recipe of it, but not as good as my recipe.

Dessert options were: peach cobbler, some chocolate brownie thing, and banana pudding.  I was disappointed that there was no rice pudding or bread pudding.  I opted for the peach cobbler.  It tasted like butter! It needed ice cream or at least a glass of milk to cut the richness. It was good, but way to rich for my blood, literally. 

All in all, it tasted exactly like dinner at my mother's house on any given Sunday when I was a kid, or at my house when I get a hankering for Southern cooking.  

After dinner, we went into Paula's store. The store is bigger than the restaurant, which is probably the whole point.  I looked around, but ultimately decided not to buy anything. I already know how to make all those Southern specialties, and I prepare them for my family on a regular basis.  I decided that $25 for a meal of rice and veggies with a dollop of peach cobbler at the end was profit enough for Miss Paula.  

Bottom line: The Lady and Sons serves perfectly prepared Southern comfort food that is sinfully overpriced. If you grew up on Southern cooking, but do not cook yourself, it might be worth it for the sake of sentiment.  Otherwise, I'm sorry to say, I thought The Lady and Sons was kind of a rip off.

I would not go back there.

Things that make you go -- HUH?

While taking a walk today at the park, I saw a couple of guys roller blading.  That is not an uncommon sight. 

The thing that struck me as odd was the fact that one of them was smoking a cigarette while roller blading. 

Huh?

A New Year

I love the New Year.  The darkest part of the year is past. With each day, there is more sunlight.  That turning point is very significant for a person who suffers from SADD. Typically I don't actually start to feel better until near the end of February.  It helps (a little) to know, intellectually, this time of the year that the days are growing longer.  The Wheel of Life had turned and a new adventure has begun. 

Christmas may not be a big deal to me any more, but the New Year is a moment to stop, think, reflect and contemplate the meaning of it all. 

In the meantime, I'm off for another quick business trip for the remainder of the week.